Total eclipse of the soul (Twilight Eclipse, franchise, 2010)

It took enthusiasm to make it to the midnight showing. But once there I was awash in hormones testosterony women’s hormones from little women dressed for a campus soiree in high school, accompanied by mother women guarding their chicks(midnight showing of twilight, any man watching it is … know? 🙂 ) but nothing would stop the little darlings from having a good time. not even a bella that’s too old to play kristen stewart. not even . as a twitterverse bard put it “twilight is like a soccer game.noone gets any action, they run around chasing one another for two hours and a billion fans insist you just don’t get it

But the points were made . All of them. the hagiography of the klan of male vampires that would do no harm from their seattle home. the iconization of rain and green grown like moss on an english cottage. Bella’s celibateness(she can’t FUCK but why doesn’t he pleasure her? or is she too saintly to masturbate?) celebrated as teachable virtue to the oversexed american (pre) teen..if Bella can do it so can you..and a “boys will be Boys” celebration of violence that legitimizes in one breath football, drug gangs, highschool race cliques and  moll-ness of the trophy girlfriend. Twilight is the new grease.

After the second episode New Moon, it was difficult for me not to take the franchise seriously. Something came together in that film that brought together the sensitive 19 year old in Kristen stewart and my inner sensitive 19 year old in a way I got longing. Something about there not being rob Pattinson in the film drew me into bella’s loneliness like one would be attracted to a newly broken up girl at your work. and the film started and ended perfectly with a classical indian love poetry grammar to it. Lovers are together they separate from circumstances, they long (and long and long) and reunite in the end to great emotional requiting of love(marry me Bella! and the crowd goes wild!!).

So what could eclipse do to top new moon? nothing it turns out, Eclipse is the meaningless sequel just as much as Twilight was the set up. Dakota fanning looks like a classic southern  child woman, Bella looks way too old and while there is smouldering chemistry between taylor lautner and stewart(mostly because the man looks like a porn star tarzan all pumped up for action,in every scene) the vampires that made the movie just dont want to let the girls get used to the idea of wolf-human sex.

Vampires need the blood more, it seems.

In summary, watch Eclipse if you like to look at enthusiastic girls of a certain age dressed in their friday mall best. If youre serious about romance , rent New Moon.


About rameshram

Name : Ramesh Ram... Email Address : (don't even ask) Blog: (never updated) Height/ Weight: 6'1 175 (varies between 160 and 185) Color of hair/ eyes black/ brown Bald? Nope (not yet, but give me 20 years.) Interests: Film (Bollywood/international indie), Travel (Germany/Japan/Central America/Sout/east/west Asia/ Northern Africa), Gizmo geek, Clubbing... What do I like in a good movie?: Women, Music, Auters, Special effects, Style. What do I like in a bad movie?: Women, Music, Auters, Special effects, Style. Favorite Critic: International: Bazin Domestic: J Hobermann Indian : me. (noone else comes close ...India or here..) Best quality: Humility. Outspokenness. Warmth Worst quality: Intolerence Favorite color : Yellow Black Blue Favorite Perfume : men: Grey Flannel(Geoffery Beene) Women: Celine dion: Obsession Boxers / briefs : Boxers Did I inhale: And how! Author: Marquiz, Rushdie, Murakami, Jong Last Book: The Ethical Slut by Dossie Easton, Catherine A. Liszt Music : Patricia Kass, Alejandro Sanz,Nina Simone, Amir Diab Sports person: What am I usually in : White briefs and tees. Chianti or Burgandy: Chianti Food: French Japanese(street/fast food). Saw and liked: No Country for old men, Lust Caution Saw and disliked: Nishabd Didnt see: Aaja Nach le. Call me: Write me first.
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One Response to Total eclipse of the soul (Twilight Eclipse, franchise, 2010)

  1. Karigai says:

    Sweetly ‘summer’-ized. 🙂

    I never got into the whole Twilight phenom and heard the books were so-so, but the movies do seem to have set the hearts of glitter-eyed-girls-of-a-certain-age on fire. lol@ mother hens clucking warily over their chicks in the wake of uncle types showing up at the (presumed) girlscouts only midnight outing.

    Looks like you’re saying the “More swoon than substance” Tesla headline (from merc business section y’day) could just as well apply to this movie? But if you liked New Moon so much, maybe you should give Eclipse another chance. Who knows, as the name suggests, its merits may not be non-existent but merely hidden and ready to emerge at any moment from occultation. 😛

    Loved the titular riff on the Bonnie Tyler song, btw. (The last I listened to it was April 1st; I’d walked into Trader Joe’s at the end of a downright depressing day thanks to whole-world-knows-what when this song came on, wow!)

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